I told myself to never blog up pointless angry rants. I’m in the midst of fighting a sore throat + flu + an on & off fever along with deadlines nearing each other and meetings. I can’t help but to just type it out here. So reader, if you’re reading this, just know that this post isn’t to anyone in particular. It’s just something that has been hovering in my mind.
It’s funny isn’t it, that you only say “I’m sorry” when you realised how much pain you’ve caused the person. The word ‘sorry’ has been thrown in all kinds of directions and the voice in my head can’t help but to question : “If you’re actually sorry, prove it,” ; which brings back to my earlier paragraph of an angry rant. I wouldn’t call this rant but it’s more a ‘I-wish-you-would-understand’ kind of post, y’know?
I’ve heard it before when an ex-boyfriend (or a friend even) tells me that they’re “sorry” and they would “be here if you need me.” So let me ask you, if you tell a person that you’ll be there for him/her, where were you at 3 a.m. when the person is on the floor on both of his/her knees begging to the pain to stop even if it means to stop breathing once and for all? The lines “We could still be friends, just not close ones anymore. But I’ll still be here for you.” in my opinion is none other than lies.
If you noticed, people in funerals tend to wish how much the dead would be alive so they could prove themselves again to that person in the coffin. Bare in mind, the guilt only happens when you find out that the person is hurt, dead or suffering from some kind of disease. We take things for granted and there’s a reason why ‘sorry’ doesn’t work anymore ; unless you prove it. I’m not saying that you need to beg that person for forgiveness but more of…mean your initial words.
Actually be there for the person. Actions do speak louder than words, after all.