I’m writing this while you’re out for a night drive. I’m sorry that I didn’t climb over the gate sooner to pick you up to hold you. I wished I was there to hold you before you collapsed on the floor of the car porch, breaking down. Mich and I came over to the house to surprise you because I flew back earlier in the afternoon and I knew you would be here in the house. I don’t know how long you were on the floor hugging your knees but as I picked you up, you couldn’t stop crying and your eyes were swollen. I’m sorry, the boys and I failed in being your friends.We’re in different countries and some of us are resting in peace. But you’re the strongest among us all. Watching you slowly standing up just now and telling Mich and I that you’re fine while wiping your eyes was just heart breaking. We just stood there while you told us that you’re okay.
I’m sorry that we couldn’t take away all the hurt and pain you’ve been feeling since 2011. But Win, I just want to tell you that all of us are so proud of you. You always see the good in someone even though the person hurt you. You taught everyone of us to forgive because it was you who taught us boys that forgiving the key to happiness. You saved most of us from depression and anxiety problems. People say that you’re lucky to have friends like us but we’re the lucky ones to have a friend like you, Win. You’re smart, talented and so beautiful. Looking at my full sleeve tattoo, I’ll forever be reminded how talented you are. You’re smart ; the paper you published, the scholarship you hold and your amazing writing skills. And you’re always, always so beautiful. I won for the photography project because you were my model.
If given a chance we would take away all the pain away because you weren’t always this unhappy. You weren’t this broken. I love you okay, Win? Everyone of us. Even the ones who are buried underground. We’re proud of you for still standing strong even when you want to give up. We’re always proud of you, soldier. Always.
Love, Mars & The Stars.