Love is a luxury.

Please just forget me
When I'm out all alone on the east coast.
And please don't forgive me
When you're home all alone and you need me most

I personally grew up in an environment that I’m glad I get to witness the ‘art of love’ with my own eyes. My grandparents married over 50+ years. I’ve been in and out of relationships and I’ve seen friends and family do the same. Bottom line, love really is a luxury. They say that a diamond is a luxury but to me, love is luxury ; for in reality, love is not what everyone get to experience. At the age of 20, I’ve watched my heart been broken, sew back together, stepped on, cheated on and now it’s tired. Don’t get me wrong. I still give it my all when it comes to relationships, friendships and in everything I do. I don’t mind pouring my heart out when I do something.

You see, ‘love’ always knew always knew I was never that great in relationships and it had taught me a lot. One major thing it taught me was that it comes hand-in-hand with hurt. With hurt, heartbreaks, tears and sadness comes. Yeah, it’s definitely not like The Notebook from Nicholas Sparks and this is coming from an avid reader of Nicholas Sparks’ works. Being a teenager/young adult, it is tough because every one of us wants someone to love us.

It uses its charms on me to fall for people and it managed to bring me joy. No doubt it’s tiring and exhausting to keep up but I’m glad I grew up watching ‘love’ perform its wonders on people ; especially the love between my grandparents. It’s not always rainbows and sunshine or kisses and dates. It’s about the way ‘love’ somehow manage to make the heart, soul and mind feel as one. It’s between all the hurt and tears. Sometimes, I lose myself in ‘love’ and I wouldn’t know what to do. And now, it’s the point of emotional exhaustion but I’m not giving up on ‘love’ just yet.

Ah, love. It’s a sweet misery ; the irony.

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