It’s not goodbye. It’s a ‘I’ll see you later’

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” *smiles* I love you, baby girl”
“I love you too, Mr. Nathaniel White. You promise you won’t leave me?”
“I promise. Pinky swear and cross my heart. I love you, Winnie Wong. And I always will”

The was our last conversation ; our last Skype session.

Rest in peace. I know it has been weeks but I know God needs you more than I’ll ever need you so be a kick ass angel wherever you are for I know that I’m forever loved by you.

I told myself I won’t break down and cry ; after so many days. Then I find myself standing at the exact same spot where you and I first talked and I broke down into silent sobs. I know you’re probably look down at me thinking I’m still the strongest girl you’ve ever loved. Thank you for the past 1 year of showing me how to love and that distance is nothing when you love someone. I was blessed to have someone like you to love me, to believe in me and to be there for me when I’m so flawed.

I’ve never actually told anyone and the first person whom I told was Deia because she knows how much you made me feel.  The reason for doing so is because I was waiting for my mid-semester break. I’ve just told everyone and posted on my Twitter, Instagram, and here. I didn’t want to answer any questions of you being gone so instead I didn’t pick up any calls or reply anyone.

I promised I’ll try to do the things I like. I still pray for you and I feel silly wondering whether you actually hear me. My life lately has been falling apart like it always has been and now I have to fix it up by myself.

I’ll see you after I’m done with this life. Be nice in Heaven.

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2 thoughts on “It’s not goodbye. It’s a ‘I’ll see you later’

  1. Don’t be strong because you feel you need to. Be strong because you want to – and because you know that he will want you to be. The only thing you can believe is that in time, it will get better. It’ll never be the same but it will be better.
    I’m sorry for your loss. But I’m sure that everyday that you get up on your feet, he is proud of you, and each day, you make him even more proud to have been yours.

    1. SERENA LIM? You still read my blog? 🙂

      Aww thank you for your kind words and your care. I miss talking to you. I’ll be fine 🙂 I hope Canada is doing you well xx

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